When church leaders attempt to deal with educational leaders, there can sometimes be a degree of frustration. Church leaders are approaching the school with the thought that they have something valuable to offer the school (which they do!), and they assume that the school personnel will be grateful and welcome the church with open arms. The reality is that most of the educational leaders I know are so overworked and under-appreciated that they are just striving to stay afloat and put out the latest fire. What that means is that the educational leader may not have time to answer your e-mail or return your call because it is not their highest priority.
Let's say that your church wants to start a mentoring program or volunteer at the school or (best of all!) start a Crossroads Kids Club after school program. Whatever you are doing you want to make friends with the school's principal and any other leaders in the school district. So, you probably want to sit down and meet face-to-face. Let's say that you find the principal's name and e-mail address on the school's web site, and you send them an e-mail introducing yourself, explaining your idea for collaboration, and asking for a meeting. You spend 20 or 30 minutes to craft an e-mail that sounds just right and hit the send button. Of course, you get an immediate reply and the principal is ready to meet with you tomorrow, right? (Well,
you might, but
I have yet to see it work that way!) Almost never does this get a response. So, you wait a few days and then follow up with a phone call. Occasionally, you may catch the principal by phone and find that they have read the e-mail. What is more likely though is that you will leave a message with the secretary or on a voicemail. Wait a few days after leaving the message...no response. E-mail again. Call again. Drop in at the school...no response. Should you give up? No!
After all those calls and e-mails, I think most people would give up and figure that the principal is not interested in working with them. After all, they haven't returned any of your messages. There is probably frustration or even a suspicion that the principal is prejudiced against churches. Not so fast. Principals have so many things coming at them, and it may take lots of patience, persistence, and grace to actually build a relationship. First, realize that they are overworked: supervising staff, dealing with angry parents, feeling the pressure of standardized tests. Try to understand their situation and have
patience. Second, be
persistent. Don't expect a call back after leaving one message. Keep trying. Don't be rude or stalker-ish, but keep trying every few days. What you want to do is worth doing, so push a little. Third, be
gracious. Even if you are calling for the 16th time, when you get that principal on the phone do not mention the previous 15 calls. Those don't matter anymore. Forgive for whatever offense you feel and move on with a positive conversation.
Taking into consideration the fact that you need to have patience, persistence, and grace, I would also suggest these tips for establishing communication:
- Try calling about 2–3 hours after the school day ends. This is the time when the principal will likely be alone in the building completing paperwork. They may have time to receive your call then.
- Before attempting to talk about your idea, just drop off a basket of goodies and a note of appreciation for the school staff to put in their break room. Odds are the principal will notice, and you will generate good will.
- Attempt to build a relationship with the school secretary or office staff. Dropping off treats (as per above) is one way to do that, but be creative. The school secretary is the gatekeeper.
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